Innuendo

You cannot take me anywhere.  Case in point:

Went to the grocery store this afternoon.  When I was checking out, the cashier was a very cute guy named Andrew who I had seen and talked with a little before.  He was helping me bag my groceries, and he asked is he could put my eggs in a separate bag.

My reply: You can do anything you like with my eggs.

As soon as I said it, I realized what it sounded like.  The woman behind me started laughing and I paused.  Andrew blushed, and put his head down on the counter, laughing.   Then  I had to swipe my card three times because both him and I were so flustered that we kept hitting the wrong button when trying to chose what type of card it was.  

I swear, if I had been trying to flirt with him, I wouldn't have ever thought to say that.  Ahhh, at least I'm amusing.